99 Posted July 20, 2004 Report Posted July 20, 2004 Warning - long post below! The Rally in Rocky was easily the WORST rally I have ever competed in. It started with the accelerator cable clamp kept coming loose and we had to stop in FRONT of channel 9 camera man, maybe we made it on telly?!! I looked like a BIG dork sprinting to put out triangles, Rob call me back once fixed, jump in the car, starter motor not working, get out, push start the car (puff pant). Repeat 9 times in 8 stages during the event (maybe more, can't remember). Then bang clang knock clunk from rear, stop to look, missing 3 wheel nuts on the rear passenger wheel, get a nut of 3 other tyres, get going again. Driving along in next stage, double caution dip, DOUBLE caution dip, DOUBLE CAUTION DIP!! BANG!!! Rob my terratrip is speaking Russian, Rob Rob can you hear me?! Um, what the damn sign language for my terratrip is cactus, scream at each other for a bit, oh look terratrip back, need to recalibrate, ooops Russian again. 200 right at crossroads, 100 right at crossroads, go under bunting straight ahead - DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME!!! YES I DID!! We scream at each other, turn right but it's very wrong, needed to turn left, do a 624-point turn to eventually find our way. End Stage. Steam seeping from our ears, daggers flying from eyes. Find battery shorted out on brackets, Rob tightens as best as possible. Lining up at start of next stage - look rim completely bent, but tyre is staying up? do a lightning quick tyre change before sprinting down the road to book in at control. Go through stage, probably stopped gob loads of times to fix cable, learnt new swear words again. Into service, found battery dangling down around the sump guard but remarkably working! Put car back together with help of lovely service crew. We LOVE service crew. Complete one stage free of hassle - yippee, hooray, call the presses! Next stage we lose accelerator cable again. Curse of the thousand blasting bad swearing words from Rob. He kicks Redwarf, I worry about his foot. Fix problem but can't push start car, there was simply not enough energy between the two of us. We try, oh, at least 12 times. We're exhausted, resigned to a non-finish. We sweatily cry into our Gatorades and curse this damned rally. Our friends Davey and Moisty come up and push car, we love them big time, finish stage, limp to the next one, just make it to the start control but used all of our late time. Yep, we're out of rally, but we haven't gone this far for them to kick us out. Stuff 'em we'll keep going until they kick us out. Get slotted into the back of the field for the rest of the staegs, it's getting dark and dust is BAD. Rob is trying super hard out of sheer aggro. Remind him we have nothing to gain, everything to lose. We drift off the road with arse hanging out into grass many times and this datgirl has visions of logs and stumps and us turning over. The next time, we overshoot I get a very good look at a post and lookie there, yep Rob we got it! White post imprint found on back of redwarf at next service. Last stage is night time, caught completely in dust behind slower car, can't drive in these conditions for *&^%. Rob does anyway, this datgirl scared for the first time in a long time cos she can't see what redwarf sees. I also feel the most carsick I have felt in a looong time, nearly throws up. End of stage. We finish, hell and damnation it's over. We flop like black stinking Labradors into our respective beds, race boots, dirt and all. Service crew wakes us up for presentation dinner and we marvel and the dirt imprints we left on our beds. We are utterly astonished to hear our names called out at the presentation dinner. We weren't out of late time after all. And we the only competitors in class. Rob tells everyone that it was a great event and we'll be back. Like f***k we will!! Quote
demuire Posted July 20, 2004 Report Posted July 20, 2004 Oh wow. I don't know if to say "Wow" or "F**K". Hmm. Sounds like a bit of an epic, almost sounds like my epic at Coastal, except worse. Can it be worse? Yes it does sound worse... Hmm. Hope Redwarf is better now. Hope Mel is all good. Hope Rob is still a happy Rob. If help is needed in Redwarf Motorsport let Fook know. Quote
99 Posted July 20, 2004 Author Report Posted July 20, 2004 Rob seems a little better today which is good for all concerned. I think we got a bit tired and consequently some strong words, but hey, that's what rally teams are about!! It's remarkable how much cussing you can do in a car and still be best mates at the end of the day!! Quote
Medicine_Man Posted July 20, 2004 Report Posted July 20, 2004 Next stage we lose accelerator cable again. Curse of the thousand blasting bad swearing words from Rob. He kicks Redwarf, I worry about his foot. He he he, such a shame you had so many problems, kicking red dwarf may not fix those problems, though i found that bit funny :) Quote
Super Jamie Posted July 20, 2004 Report Posted July 20, 2004 that's one of the most exciting stories i've read, i like it :) whenever shit goes all pear shaped, i think to myself, oh well at least it will make a good story one day, and it doesn't seem so bad. probably wouldn't help at the time tho... Quote
Redwarf Posted July 20, 2004 Report Posted July 20, 2004 Who'd have thought that one navigator could ppush a car sooooooo often, and still be able to operate!! Yes, it was crap. It can be so soul destroying when little things keep going wrong. We just kept fixing things on the fly, and kept going 'til the next thing broke. That's motorsport I spose. The highs are amazing, and the lows are just about enough to kill you. Possum Bourne said that it was when you are having a bad time, you just have to remember how good the good times were, to keep you going. I'm still wondering if Datgirl will ever climb back into a car with me...... There may be a "no pushing" clause in the agreement.... Quote
99 Posted July 20, 2004 Author Report Posted July 20, 2004 Hmmm, yes, it will go along side the clauses about getting a backrub at the end of each stage, lots of chocolates (although not after feeling that sick!), and having scantily clad boys with palm fronds cooling me down... .... mmmmm scantily clad boys with palm fronds cooling me down ... *ahem* woops, sorry Right! Yes, ofCOURSE I will get back in the car with you Redwarf!! Quote
Super Jamie Posted July 21, 2004 Report Posted July 21, 2004 how about we follow behind and we can be the Official Redwrf Push Start And Palm Frond Team!!! :) (i was going to post a picture of a muscle man, but i just found gay pornsites and got scared off) Quote
demuire Posted July 21, 2004 Report Posted July 21, 2004 Scantily-clad Jamie... *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA* Quote
99 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Report Posted July 21, 2004 OOops, did I just post that?! Just joking, really meant to say *EWWWWWWWWWW* (easy to get mixed up) Quote
demuire Posted July 21, 2004 Report Posted July 21, 2004 Hmm, now we all know what Mel fantasizes about :D *shivers* :) Quote
99 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Report Posted July 21, 2004 Thank you Grim now back to business Redwarf the car (scantily clad or otherwise) is already half repaired thanks to Redwarf the man. It will be making an appearance at the Qld Challenge on Saturday! Yay!!! Quote
Super Jamie Posted July 21, 2004 Report Posted July 21, 2004 YAY I WANT TO BE THERE WITH A BANNER THAT SAYS RED DWARF whos your favorite red dwarf character? i like kryten Quote
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